Self-Esteem can improve your personal and professional life, and in the right amount can boost your confidence and fling open doors of opportunity.
Some people naturally have self-esteem and a strong sense of self-confidence, and you might wonder – Why? Why do some people have a healthy dose of well-earned self-esteem, and some others have huge amounts and you think, why is this person so confident?
If you’d like to raise your self-esteem but you don’t want to come across as full of yourself, you’d be well served to focus on “authentic self-esteem.”
Think of “authentic self-esteem” as self-confidence that emerges as a natural development when you consistently hold yourself to a higher standard, and benefit yourself and others as a result.
To build “authentic self-esteem” follow these three actions.
Number one: Focus on your positive traits, your goal it to be who *you* are at your best. You’re not trying to be the jokey, center of attention, life of the party if that’s not your natural style. Perhaps your style is to be more quiet and introspective, to listen rather that to take the lead in every conversation.
Appreciate how your unique qualities help others feel connected, important, unique and interesting.
Your goal is to be your best self, not someone else. You couldn’t sustain this kind of false approach, it would feel fake, and it would be exhausting! Besides, you want to be appreciated for who you truly are, yes?
So, first step, focus on your very best traits, and play them up!
Action number two: Track your progress. Each day, think of ways your unique traits can contribute to the world around you. You don’t have to solve major world problems, here. Simply consider how a specific action will help enhance the quality of life of those around you. And, be sure to write down specific actions you can take and follow through on them.
Here’s how to carry out this specific action: Go buy a spiral notebook. No need for a fancy $100 leather-bound journal, just a simple spiral notebook the kids use for school.
Consider 3 actions a day that play to your strengths that you could track. Let’s say that you are kind and sensitive. Simple. You can set these simple goals: Look the grocery checker in the eye and make small talk. Ask the receptionist how her weekend was as you walk to your desk. Compliment someone in the break room on their hair cut or sweater.
Your actions are breaking you out of your shell, connecting you to others, and improving the quality of life for those who get to be in your space. Sounds like something to feel good about, wouldn’t you agree?
Action number three: feel free to start small, with the suggestions above. You’ll soon find that “authentic self-esteem” blooms quite quickly when you focus on these three steps.
Remember that this brand of self-confidence is not about you being prideful, but rather you get to experience a genuine emotion of feeling good about yourself. Your actions matter to others, and so do you! Act now!
Crystal Jonas, “The People Skills Lady” teaches people to express themselves at their best so they can be more productive and profitable. For info on coaching with Crystal, write Crystal@CrystalJonas.com
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